Sunday, August 1, 2021

Story about hitting the wall and filling the void

I knew it would look like that. It's like playing games with my mental issues - and cheating to win, haha!

I plopped into a creative abyss with Void Blade. I managed to write several pages of text and random tables and made two full pages of laid out artwork and text. And created half of a map. And then I hit a wall, again. 

Guess what happened next... 

After half a day spent in brawling with depression (played ADOM, had an amazing run, got torn into shreds by Cat Lord), my brain was immediately filled with an urge to work on Pain instead. And it actually worked - currently I'm filling the gaps in the descriptions.

Also, I realized that there is a significant flaw in my mindset - it's like a clearly visible pit in front of me, and it's filled with manure. And I still hop into it, each time. 

I often thing "I must do this", "I must do that". And that's okay. Life forces us to do things all the time. And in many cases, it's rather wise to do some things. But - at least in this case - the problem is not that I must design some less-fun stuff, like equipment lists and monster stat blocks. The problem is that it took me DECADES to figure out that it depends solely on me HOW I will make these things. How I will design them and how I will present them in the rulebook.

What does it mean for the game? From your perspective - not much. From my point of view - everything has changed. And I must hack out the significant portions of the manuscript, and rework it. But it will be fun.

Two posts in a row? I must be outta my mind!

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